Try Not to Pee on Other People’s Chips
It is easy to see how the beliefs of other people are shaped by their culture, upbringing, education, and genes (apparently). It is harder to appreciate how the exact same applies to my own way of looking at the world. If I get annoyed because other people believe X, it is because I’ve been indoctrinated to see things this way.
Let’s face it, the shit in our head is mostly stuff we didn’t choose to put there. Nobody asked me if I wanted to be born in Ireland, at least I don’t remember having such a conversation, yet so many of my beliefs and opinions are due to my nationality. If you had my life, you would think the exact same way as me, and the reverse is also true.
I can be as judgmental a dick as anyone else, but this judging always leaves a bad taste in my mouth. If people believe things that are annoyingly different from me, I can blame it on their culture, lack of education (or the wrong type of education), or a bad upbringing. These poor saps believe what they do because they have been brainwashed. But hold on a minute here – the reasons I believe what I believe is because I’ve been brainwashed too.
I don’t have that many memories before the age of seven, but I do remember how everyone I met interested me. I’d no opinions about people’s nationality, race, religion, sexual orientation, or any of that sort of bollocks – all of that shit came later. It was wonderful living in a world where people were just people, and when I didn’t look at lie through such heavy filters created by my later conditioning.
The internet has made it so easy for any one of us to climb up onto a soapbox to tell other people how they are getting it wrong. The comment section for online newspapers, or comments on web forums, are mostly about people trying to defend their own beliefs while attacking anyone who thinks different. Nobody stops to consider just how farcical the whole situation is – it’s like one person who is standing on a pile of shit who starts ridiculing someone else for standing on a pile of shit.
I think all of us are trying our best. The only real difference between my beliefs and someone else’s beliefs is our individual indoctrination. Sure, there are times when I might need to take a stand, but most of these arguments are just infantile. I’m sure most keyboard warriors think they are making the world a better place, by ridiculing the beliefs of other people, but it is really about their own insecurities and hang-ups – my shit smells better than your shit sort of thing.
Nice post. It’s one of those things which is both obviously true and instantly forgotten so we all need to be reminded again and again.
I know what you mean Dan – if only I could master this basic stuff, my life would be almost perfect
Paul, I am Gary, age 66, for now-retired professional substance abuse counselor, personally–recovering alcoholic, 27 years sober. Presently in major life changes. Had brain tumor discovery last October–surgery, in better shape than before now. And doing something always wanted to do–living in foreign country not being solder–like in vietnam, or not working for USA military as addiction counselor–like in Okinawa, just living, enjoying. I have chosen Chiang Mai. In process also of divorce–3rd one–we still good friends–decided to live in reality now–we have been only friends for last 9 years, no intimacy.
My 2nd thing to do—to discover intimacy for first time–and seems a younger woman is only way to open.
I continue to follow the ‘we’ way of life i learned in AA–with any other thing i am doing in life. So am looking for contacts who are already in thailand–to put on my support network–to benefit from their experiences of moving to and living in Thailand.
So would like to ask my many questions–visa, choose what area in city to live in, i have found good gym to join–as i gym workout every other day–not for muscle building but for endorphin wash of brain-Centara Duangtawan Fitness Club
132 Loy Kroh Road, Chiang Mai 50100, Thailand. Finding AA meetings, Choosing a furnished apartment close to gym. And then once these things solved, then good directions on research on thai women–since don’t do night life, no bar girls, but how to get acquainted, find, get to educate myself on them and their culture–approach to older western man.
my email address is grwirfs@yahoo.com
Gary