Sometimes I Miss Working as a Nurse

It is tempting to fall into the trap of taking things for granted, but I do feel thankful to have ended up in a career that I generally love. There are still mornings when I don’t feel like doing much work, but I never wake up dreading it or wishing that I could do something else for a living. I’m satisfied to be a writer for the rest of my life, something I never felt with any other job, but I do miss working as a nurse. I’ve a great deal of respect for those who continue to work in the profession, and I still consider it to be one of the most important jobs on the planet.

Technically I am still a Nurse

I suppose that technically I could still claim to belong to the nursing profession. I pay to renew my registration each year, and it probably wouldn’t be that difficult for me to get another job. One of the nice things about a career in nursing is that there is usually a high demand for these professionals somewhere in the world.

It is now over a decade since I gave up working full time, but up until a couple of years ago I still did some agency work when I returned back to Ireland on my holidays. I had to give this up because it just didn’t feel safe to continue. It is not possible to stay up to date with nursing practice when you only work a few weeks of the year. I did try to keep my knowledge up through continued study, and I even brought my nursing diploma up to a degree, but it just wasn’t sufficient without the practical experience. I was faced with the choice of going back full time or giving up completely – my dream of a career in writing made the choice easy. It would have been so nice if I could still work as a nurse for a few weeks each year but that just wasn’t feasible. I haven’t burnt any bridges with nursing, but it is getting to the stage now that I’d probably have to do a ‘back to nursing’ course if I wanted to return – not too big a deal I suppose.

Things I Miss About Nursing

One of the things I miss most about nursing is the contact with patients. This is the most satisfying aspect of the job, but it can also be the most emotionally draining. I spent a good deal of time around those who were terminally ill, and just listening to these people, and their family, can be one of the most valuable service a nurse can offer. Before I entered the profession I would’ve run a mile if someone wanted to talk to me about their impending death, but I learned to overcome this fear. I also developed the skills needed to be a good listener – which is against my natural inclination to just talk talk talk. Frequently the conversations with patients involved lighthearted banter, and I got to understand the value of making a negative experience better with a bit of humor – I miss this type of conversation the most.

I also miss the crack with the other nurses. It is nice being a man in a predominately female profession, and it completely changed my view of females. Before that I never really had any girl ‘friends’ – the only females I was interested in were girlfriends and those who I wanted to be my girlfriend. While working as a nurse I found that it was possible to have meaningful friendships with women that didn’t involve sex. I miss the long conversations with my nursing colleagues – especially the ones we would have on the night shift when we sometimes have to keep talking just to stay awake.

I suppose the thing that I really miss about nursing is the sense of satisfaction I got from seeing how my efforts made a difference to people. There were too many times that I left the ward terrified that I’d forgotten something or did something wrong ( I don’t miss that) but most of the time there was a great deal of satisfaction in knowing that I’d done some good work. I miss helping people like that. I do like to think that by sharing my experiences about alcoholism on here it does help people at least in a small way but perhaps I’m deluding myself. I do get emails and comments from people thanking me, but it is difficult to believe that my words make much of a difference. There are hundreds of websites offering advice to those struggling with addiction and many of them do a much better job than I do. It is just not the same as walking away from a patient knowing that your actions helped them.

I think that I’m lucky to have worked in two careers that I love. It would be nice to have the best of both worlds, but it just does not seem possible.