Become an Extrovert for Future Happiness and Health

Research from the UK suggests that extroverts enjoy improved life expectancy, better health, and a greater sense of well-being as they get older. I came across this news today while reading a web article on the Discover Magazine called Extroverts are Happier and Healthier Later in Life. I take any claims based on the latest research surveys with a large pinch of salt, but the suggestion that extroverts live longer does sound reasonable to me.

Social Misfits Are Screwed

If you read my recent post on here called Confessions of a Social Misfit, you will know that I tend to look upon social intercourse as a type of communicable disease that is usually best avoided. I can be a compulsive talker, but I just don’t feel comfortable around other people – I tend to walk away from social intercourse feeling a bit dirty and yucky. My status as a social misfit doesn’t feel like that big a deal to me, but I understand that it probably should be.

I’ve become a far more positive person in recent years, and I already enjoy long stretches of inner contentment, so I’m not sure how being less of a social misfit would improve my life. I’m also not interested in becoming more extroverted in the hope that it might help me live for longer. This Discover Magazine article is about people who had been extroverts all of their lives anyway, so maybe my many years of being a miserable git means that I’ve missed the boat as far as those benefits are concerned. My drive to become less of a social misfit is coming from somewhere else – it is the desire to be the best person I can be.

How to Become a People Person

I’ve been looking online for tips on how to be more sociable. I found this useful article from the Guardian Newspaper called How to be an Extrovert which contained a few interesting ideas including:

• Allow myself to be an extrovert. This is based on the idea that inside every introvert is an extrovert just waiting to burst out – possibly true.
• Focus more on the positive things in life – I’m starting to just naturally do this as I become more positive.
• Be more adventurous. I am itching to take up kite surfing, but it is just finding the funds for this.

I’m interested in becoming more sociable rather than necessarily becoming an extrovert. The things that have worked for me in the past would include

• As a nurse I was taught to count to 10 after somebody stops speaking before saying anything. This forced me to pay attention to what they were saying and not on what I wanted to say.
• I need to take more interest in other people. I tend to be a self-obsessed prick most of the time – it’s all me, me, me, and can we talk about me now.
• I’ve found that mindfulness makes social situations much easier for me. I just concentrate on what is happening, and I ignore the mental chatter inside of my brain.
• Find legitimate reasons to compliment other people. This is worked for me in the past, but it does feel a bit sleazy unless the compliment is completely honest. The trick is to look for something about the other person that deserves complimenting – it is always there if I look for it.
• Smile at people more – even if it means risking a blank stare or a complete rundown of a stranger’s sex life.